cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (hola)
Trying something new here, in an effort to revive my flagging blogging powers. On Fridays, I aim to list a few things that have made me happy over the week. Today, it's treats from the cupboard. Feel free to talk up your faves in the comments!

1. Cinnamon Somersaults. I picked these bite-sized cookies up because I wanted to jumpstart Fall. They're delicious and filling. I don't think I've eaten a full serving in one sitting, because just a few satisfy me. I'm interested in the Salt and Pepper ones, too. Anyone tried those?

2. Adagio Teas, especially the fandom blends. This week I restocked my faves from the Hannibal-themed sampler I bought awhile back. And I bought some sample tins that continue my theme of "Desperate for Fall." Yesterday I melted over Halloween Caramel Apple.

3. Caramel Apple Dip + Pepperidge Farm Gingerman Cookies. Tweetie and I dunked the cookies in caramel apple dip for dessert last night. We each had 2 and a half cookies and were completely satisfied. Sooo rich, sooo good, sooo autumnal.

I'd hoped to take the family apple picking this weekend, but it's rained so much the last couple of days. I don't think J and Tweetie really want to go slopping through the soggy orchard. So these treats (and my scented candles!) will have to satisfy my autumnal yearnings for a little longer.

How do y'all scratch that seasonal itch?
cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (lennon cat)
Fickle Spring has set her lightning hand upon Iowa, drawing worms up from rain-soaked soil to gasp and die on sidewalks and roads, by bird or burning light. At night, we sleep with windows open...until dogs still unaccustomed to sleeping out of doors startle at owl hoots and shadows. We know not whether short sleeves or sweaters are best suited to the day. Also, rabbits.

When not playing hopscotch over earthworms, I've been following news of the Arkansas tar sands spill. I wonder when I'll be cynical, paranoid, or wise enough to no longer be surprised that these things happen: that the rich and powerful are so careless of the rest of us, that corporations destroy our homes and lives with impunity, that the government allows the perpetrators to command airspace and control the media... Honestly, I write about this stuff and it's called science fiction?

(On a related note, I discovered this weekend that the used blu-ray of The Crazies I bought from the Blockbuster belly-up is scratched. Is it true I can use Turtle Wax to mend the disc?)

As for writing, yes, I'm doing it, but I'm shoulder-deep in novel revisions, discussion of which would only bore you. Trust me. But on the topic of writing, [ profile] alankria has a good post on using "they" as a singular personal pronoun. It is a position I've come to share over the last couple of years. Copyeditors are not generally known for flexibility, and newbies especially enforce "rules" without considering the ethical implications of those rules. But as I've become more educated about gender issues and more familiar with genderqueer folks, I've discarded any stickliness/illusions about singular "they" being grammatically incorrect. I hope more people accept this usage moving forward.
cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (Default)
I'm delighting in this, our first real snowfall of the winter. It's been seriously, uncannily warm. Earlier this week we had record-breaking highs. Now we've got a good three inches to five inches on the ground, and it's still blowing around. It's reassuring. Also, it feels good on my feverish skin.

For about an hour now, this hawk has been hunched in our front tree, picking at a meal. I thought it might be a bird, the way s/he kept looking over its shoulder. (Incidentally, the house in the background looks almost exactly like our house, except we've got more going on in our yard.)

I sat watching and tweeting in awe until [ profile] asakiyume asked if I had a camera. I took these photos from our front window because I worried if I opened the front door to get a good shot, the hawk would fly off. But the zoom let me get a better look at his meal. 

Looks like a rodent after all. And now hawk is gone, having stripped all the good stuff from the bones.

cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (Default)
The leaf truck is finally coming through our neighborhood, which is a relief.  I've been dreading the idea of ice-slicked leaves layered under the inevitable snow. I was told that one of the city's leaf trucks was out of commission, the driver burned out the transmission, which is why the pick-up is three or four days late. We have not even touched the backyard, it's wearing a crunchy brown coat and probably will all winter. But I've been good about keeping the front yard in reasonably good shape, even managing to reclaim a bunch of the maple leaves that sullied the neighbors' pristine lawns.

If I walk one mile northeast, I'm out in the country, where I wouldn't have to rake leaves at all, I could just let 'em drift. But then, I'd also have to deal with badgers and mountain lions. Maybe it's a fair trade.

cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (hammer head)

storm-tossed toys
a wiffleball buoy
befuddles fish


Yesterday was a Very Bad Day. Not because of anything that happened, just because of my brain and its peculiar programming. I actually cried. Then I had a couple of drinks, which disconnected me from the pain but left the anxiety. I spent much of the night working on a jigsaw puzzle and trying not to fly apart. I had to remind myself to breathe.

Today is a Deceptively Good Day. By which I mean, I feel great, but I know much of this feeling is due to brain chemistry, I am bouncy and chatty and my mind flits from one fine idea to another. I am very happy, nevertheless. I've really missed this euphoria. It will (I hope I hope I hope) give way to milder contentment and true productivity, but for now, it is a pleasure.

I spend all winter telling myself that once spring arrives, I will even out, that the fog will lift and I will be my better self again. Then spring hits and my mood goes wild and woolly as the weather here. So now I look forward to warmer weather. It's always sunny in June, right?


snowdrops crisp and yellow
earthworms cramp like icicles
on a frosty March

cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (drink me)
fog drops
on bare branches
moss crenellated
on birch
blank scrying glasses
ramparts soft to touch
cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (drink me)

misty morning
the world a glassine envelope
contents unclear

cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (crap)
Fall! I love fall. It's always been my favorite season, even when I was a kid in South Texas who had only textbook knowledge of autumn. It's the season of falling leaves, cooler temps, apples and pumpkins, Halloween, Dia de los Muertos, scarves and socks, arm warmers, sex in lieu of watching football, viable sex in cars, and so many other wonderful things. YAY!

Fall! The sun sleeps in and retires early. After a manic burst 'round late August/early September, my seratonin levels plummet. I need my Sun-in-a-box. I have to leave my bedroom blinds up so I can get whatever hint of dawn makes it through the trees. I program my coffeemaker as devoutly as my alarm clock. I spend most of the day debating whether or not to go back to bed. I mope. I cry. I ponder my sertraline dosage.

Ah, fall. Why must you make me crazy (crazier)? Why are you so much work? Why you not love me like I love you?

ETA: this definition from the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows:

Harvest chill: n. wistful foreboding at the first signs of autumn, as yellow leaves appear scattered on the ground like Post-Its leading you on a treasure hunt toward the realization that your slow slide into oblivion has already begun, steadily gathering speed on your way down to the end of the ride while the next generation waits at the top for their turn, a sobering reminder that it's never too early to start planning a kickass Halloween costume.

cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (Maggie with Coffee)


blame you,
for wanting to live
in my house. It's cozy
with strays, after all,
and lined with books, the
dust-furred urns, if you will, of
your long-lost sisters. But come winter,
trust me, you'll find that, between
these warm walls and all
the gamboling paws,
it gets to feeling
a bit

cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (happy pug tongue)

pink August blooms?
crab apple confusion caused
by trickster winds

cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (happy pug tongue)


white moths
confetti tiny
scatter from the grass
anticipating my steps

I could run
but never catch them
like a peaking wave
behind foam-laced breakers
like a girl with a butterfly net
trying to stop the decrescendo
of summer days


On an unrelated note, I am so glad to live in a place with seasons, where kids can run down the street to the neighbors' without concern, where one gardener's tomato bounty becomes a gift to passersby. It's like I've grown up to live in the neighborhood of my childhood dreams. So Tweetie can spend her dreams on even more fantastic things.


In a further unrelated note, I think it's safe to say Justin Bieber is overexposed when I do a Google image search for "white moths on lawn" and his dopey mop shows up.


Jul. 18th, 2010 09:14 pm
cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (silver teapots)

the summer-browned boy
         stalks the white egret
              down the sidewalk,
                   long legs flexing--
                        sundial needle
                             and shadow--
                                knobby knees
                                   creaking patience,
                                        wingspan still an


99 to Go!

May. 24th, 2010 03:40 pm
cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (happy pug tongue)
The rare opportunity to speak with grownups during the daytime plus the rigors of comforting a sick kid all night nearly made me forget my poem-a-day.


bees, lawnmowers, teachers...
May drones on

cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (happy pug tongue)
(Bear with me, please. Trying something out here.)


rain-drenched peonies
droop like pink shar peis
mourning May's loss
of sunshiney days

meanwhile helicopter seeds
raft down white-water graves
clogging gutters with the dross
of spring in retrograde

and catkins like clock springs
lie sprung and dazed
littering the sidewalks
with birch spunk and worm glaze


I had the wacked-out shar pei/peony simile and I had to use it, but if I left the poem as one stanza, it would've been mistaken for too-cute doggerel, so I glomped together as many mixed metaphors as I could to make a whole that was as dingo-ate-my-baby crazy as possible.

Wow. Me, manic? Don't be radicchio.

cafenowhere: teacup brimming with mysterious violet liquid (psychedelic tea)

Lilacs make thieves
of us all
and Dandelions,
Cottonwood fluff
fills our heads with dreams
and the Judas Tree
stokes secret fires

cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (happy pug tongue)


In the park with Brendan
we sipped dandelion wine
so hideously sweet
no sips could be small enough
so we took it home
cut it with cranberry juice
and froze it in paper cups
our version of
"if life gives you lemons..."
The next day
bees hassled us as we slurped
our slushies on the porch,
but pleasantly buzzed
we spit offerings on the grass
and watched our sorrows drown.
By nightfall
the caution-yellow corpses
were forgiven and forgotten--
that is, until Brendan danced
barefoot on the lawn.


This poem inspired by, believe it or not, this art by 11th dimension, via wind up boy toy.

Handwritten on a photo of the blue, cloud-studded sky, a quote from a song by Julian Casablancas: Forgive them even if they are not sorry.

Edited to add juice!
cafenowhere: teacup brimming with mysterious violet liquid (psychedelic tea)
It took me nearly a year from the time [ profile] selfavowedgeek wrote "that's the title of your next poem, right there" but here it is. One version anyway. ;)


chrome and lilacs
our motorcycles zoom through
spring's finish line


I love the internet. Here's a pic by Chuck Schultz of a black Marusho Lilac flat-twin engine motorcycle (maybe a 1964?), taken at the Barber Vintage Motorsports Museum in Alabama.

cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (neon sign)


still too cold
for the lake
but we plunge into the sun's smile
burst back out, blue-lipped,
to kiss some sense
into each other

photo of two bare-chested young men sitting on the beach, kissing, with a brilliant blue sky as backdrop; via, original post here


cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (writing)

by skeeters
we wake in the backyard
a rabbit
gobbles guiltily


On my toes!

Apr. 6th, 2010 08:53 am
cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (writing)

April flurry
we dance in scanty drifts
beneath the dogwood


Tweetie is doing her job and keeping me on my toes. This morning, I hadn't gotten halfway through my coffee before she told me that when she was a grownup and ready to start a family, she thought she would adopt. Really? I said, impressed and proud. I asked why she was planning to adopt. "Because," she said, "I don't think I want to love a man."

My thoughts, in the order I had them:
But men are so lovable.
Sister, I hear ya, too much work.
Wait a minute, did you just out yourself?
But you're already married--remember that boy from daycare?

What I finally said: "Oh. Okay."

Then she went on to discuss her child-care and career plans. I finished my coffee.



cafenowhere: coffee cup with sugar packets that read WTF (Default)

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